Showing posts with label Journaling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Journaling. Show all posts

Monday, March 5, 2012

Make it Real

Do you really think you can steal, murder, commit adultery, lie, and burn incense to Baal and all those other new gods of yours, and then come here and stand before Me in My Temple and chant, ‘We are safe!’ – only to go right back to all those evils again?” NLT Jeremiah 7:9,10

It is amazing how some people think they are safe from harm because they go to church. I’ve always wondered where those folks get their theology. They are the ones so surprised when life jumps up and bites them. But in the New Testament we are told over and over again to expect trials, tribulations, and persecutions – and that’s for those who are following after God with all their hearts. Imagine the wrath to be poured out on those who are calloused toward the Lord God!

This passage of Jeremiah is talking about people who came to the Temple on the Sabbath (or church on Sundays) and seemingly worship Him while they are there. But then they leave the building and their thoughts of God seem to be left there as well. They go on throughout the coming week with little or no regard to God and His laws. Verse 7 lists specifically six of the Ten Commandments that the Israelites were brazenly and repeatedly breaking.

The bottom line for these folks is that their religion has no personal commitment; there wasn’t anything that made it real. But not much has changed. For some people today; church is just a club where you socialize with friends and family. As Christians, we need to make sure that our church membership, attending meetings, wearing fancy clothes, or holding positions of honor doesn’t take priority over letting God change our hearts and our behavior during the week ahead. Remember, God will not be fooled. He sees your actions and your motives every day of the week, not just on Sundays. And just like in Jeremiah’s day, you won’t be safe from harm either just because you were in church a few days ago.

In a similar way, I can’t let my blog writing be for show. The stuff I write here has to make a difference in my life or I am wasting my time. Personal application has to be the focus of my writing. But it is much worse than just wasting time, because really, God will not be fooled. I am putting on a false face of worship, devotion and prayer if I don’t allow all this writing to be used by the Holy Spirit to bring me closer to His image.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

A Note on Journaling – My Version of the 3 R’s

For me, journaling seems almost like a biblical command. I’ve come to see this simple act as a sort of “stewardship”, taking care to make good use of the many, many wonderful things God does for me.

First, it honors God when we stop our busy lives to reflect on what He is doing/done for us. Second, the entire Old Testament could be nearly summarized in the word “remember”. Israel’s frequent failures, both individually and collectively, were often times directly caused by their lack of remembering God’s Providence. And lastly, we’re told to witness to others and to retell how God has been merciful and gracious to us.

Journaling, especially online blogging, provides a way for me to accomplish all three of these goals. When I sit down to journal, I stop and reflect on what God is doing in my life. The act of writing, editing, re-writing, and typing causes me to remember those actions of His as they become permanently etched on the walls of my mind. And when I share my writings, I am giving public testimony, retelling God’s dealings with me to others. And I am also encouraging, even exhorting, them to reflect, remember, and retell their own stories.


Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Why I Blog

I’ve kept journals about my walk with the Lord Jesus for over 25 years. I don’t write every day. Until 6 months ago, I didn’t even date my entries. I wasn’t consistent about length, style, or anything. I just wrote.

From 1983 when I became a born-again Christian to 1993 when my mother died, I wrote about what I discovered as I read and studied the Bible. Everything was new to me and I was basically just trying to take notes as if I was in a college class and there was a huge test next week.

As a botanist and former evolutionist, the creation account in Genesis holds a special place in my heart. A large portion of my early notes focus on Genesis and some of these take the form of actual essays that I have edited and polished over the years. Three or four of these even seem “blog worthy” and I hope to get them posted in the next few weeks or months.

In 1993, following my mother’s death, I began writing with more of myself in the storyline. My focus changed, almost over night, from “this is what the Bible teaches” to “this is what God is doing in my life”. I was catching a glimpse of the big picture – of God’s plan and purpose for me – and it was (and is) glorious! Not because of who I am, but I am amazed at what He is able to do with this lump of clay.

I was now writing for my children – the “story” of my life, of my walk with our Lord. It was intensely personal. I imagined an audience of maybe 15-20 people at most -- close friends, my children and grandchildren, and that was it. My journals became word-pictures of important events I wanted to capture, with as many details as possible. I included names, dates, and places. I wrote about meeting my husband, becoming a Christian, and the event that brought about this new writing style: my mother’s funeral.

Then in November of 2009, I felt God was leading me to make my writing public – very public – in other words, start this blog. But there was a problem – and I’ve been considering how to remedy this situation for the past 6 months. My earliest writing was “flat”. There are great truths, but there isn’t really anything there that makes it mine. By contrast, the later writing was too personal for exposure to the whole world-wide-web. I felt I needed to re-write every essay or abandon them and start fresh, blogging only new stuff.

After months of prayer and procrastination, I’ve decided to edit about a dozen of my old favorite stories to include here over the next several months. I’m feeling it is important to share with you who I was back then so you can make more sense of who I am now. And I’ve noticed that sometimes even my newest writing still refers back to some of these old essays. But the old flat essays will, hopefully, be infused with bits and pieces of my personal walk, thus making them more interesting to read. And those ultra-personal essays will have to become a little less revealing for my family and friends’ sake.

My advice for others who would like to start a spiritual journal is simple – do it! Even if no one else reads your words, it will bring you closer to God. Keep your papers in order by using a 3-ring binder or spiral notebooks. Date and/or number each page as you go. Be personal and include yourself in the storyline. At the same time, be considerate of others. If you’re writing something no one should ever read, then you should never write it. Truly, not everything is fit to be put on paper.

Finally, you’ll notice I’m including a couple “Journal Suggestions” at the end of most entries. My prayer is that these prompts are general enough that almost any reader could use them as a jumping-off point to start writing a story of their own. And of course, if you already have a blog, or are just starting one, I hope you will tell me about it.





Thursday, August 5, 2010

From Reading to Writing to Living

Over the years, my writing style has changed from being aloof and preachy to very personal. But lately I am finding myself judging an essay or blog post by one simple standard – is this Old Testament or New Testament stuff? Now I’m not talking about if the subject material comes from a date of BC or not. I’m evaluating my writing style compared to the Old Testament and New Testament writing styles.

I got the idea from a book I’ve been enjoying this summer, The Bible Jesus Read by Philip Yancey. It has an odd title, so let me explain to those who aren’t familiar with Yancey’s work. The author tells why the Old Testament is relevant to New Testament believers and the answer, in large part, is because this is the Scripture Jesus learned as a child and taught from in His ministry. But that summary of the book is really too over-simplified. The author also explains how different the two testaments are based on their biographical content.

In the New Testament we learn mostly about the lives of Jesus and Paul; two people we as Christians should strive to follow. The life of Jesus tells the story of the Perfect Man, living a sinless life, loving everyone, sharing the gospel. Paul, while not perfect, exhorts us to be like Christ and gives us many lofty ideals to strive after in our personal lives. He is also presented as a guy who has it all together. He is obviously following after Jesus, picking up his cross daily, witnessing, loving, and being the guy we’d like to think we are on our “good” days.

But from what we know of his life in the New Testament, every day was a “good” day for Paul. I’m not talking about being beaten and imprisoned as good, but I mean that every day he was out there doing the Lord’s work – and THAT is definitely a “good” day. The problem is that we don’t have a “good” day every day; I think a lot of folks might think these “good” days are maybe once a week or even once a month. In other words, the distance between the example of Jesus or Paul and my life is huge! And at times it can be very discouraging . . .

So Yancey suggests that when this happens, it is time to turn to the Old Testament and be reminded of the more “real” characters from that part of Scriptures. Here you’ll find Adam and Eve eating forbidden fruit, Noah getting drunk after getting off the Ark, Abraham lying about Sarah being his wife, Jonah trying to outrun God’s call to Nineveh, and the sad story of David – a man truly after God’s heart, being guilty of both adultery and murder. You’ll also find companionship in the Psalms, where you can read how real people dealt with fear, loneliness, anger, depression, abandonment, and disappointment.

So, it sounds like a great book, doesn’t it? But maybe you’re wondering what this has to do with my writing style. Well, the truth is that my writing can sometimes sound a lot like Paul, exhorting myself and my readers to follow Christ and live holy lives. And this is all well and good, and we should each strive for that. But wait -- that’s what the New Testament is for! No one needs ME to come along and tell them what God has already revealed in His Word.

However, I do think my writing can be an encouragement to someone who may be suffering from depression or disappointment, maybe they’re feeling angry with God over a nasty turn their life has taken. I get that, I understand, I’ve been thrown some nasty curve balls too! I think the purpose of my writing should be to be more “real” for you, my readers, whoever you are. I need to be willing to let down my guard and be honest with you about my own shortcomings. I think as Christians we run around with masks on, trying to look like Perfect Pauls on Sunday morning -- never letting anyone see the hurts and struggles we’re having.

Thanks to Yancey’s book, I’ve become more thankful for the imperfect “real” characters of the Old Testament. And I’d like to not just write more “real” but also live more “real”, letting the people around me know when I’m hurting or struggling. In other words, take off the Perfect Paul mask. . . So now for a little peek at the real me . . . I’m changing, The Lord is working in my life and I am so very thankful for this. And this means I’m not the same person I was this time last year; not by a long shot. I went through some intense biblical training last fall with Focus on the Family’s The Truth Project. As a result, I’ve quit going to a church that was 20 miles from home and now I attend a church just 6 houses away. I made this change so I wouldn’t have any excuse to not be involved with mid-week programs, and it’s working like a charm! The problem is, I may be over-extending myself. I’m pretty much exhausted – very, very happy, but also very tired. As a result, I missed my Wednesday blog deadline this week. I failed to use my time wisely. I’m not perfect. But I still want to do more, including bringing The Truth Project to this new church. I'll be leading the 13-week course starting a week from Tuesday -- so please pray for me that I’ll get organized, focused and set proper priorities.

There’s also the problem of people; there are persons in my life who need my attention, and I’m failing at times to be there for them. I’m letting distant old friends be ignored while working to build new friendships in my new town and I’m struggling with knowing if that is even biblical or not. And lastly, there are those around me that are hurting, really hurting and I’m still recovering myself from a spring with 7 funerals to attend. At times, I don’t know if I have the strength to reach out and help them when I’m hurting too. I know my over-activity at church is partly denial, not wanting to stop long enough and think about what all those lives meant to me and how much they are missed. But I need to connect with these folks, the ones who are here, still hurting – and let them know I’m really here for them, with more than “just” my prayers and cliché platitudes. So again, I need your prayers – that I will make time to do that which is truly important and have the right words to say for those around me. Thank you . . . !

James 5:16
Therefore, confess your sins to one another, and pray for one another so that you may be healed. The effective prayer of a righteous man can accomplish much.

Journal Suggestions:


Describe how a book or movie has changed your worldview.

Which parts of the Bible are your favorite / least favorite and why?

Want information on The Truth Project? visit www.truthproject.org

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

Breaking the Silence

I have been a writer nearly all my life. Yet that's news to most people, even those closest to me. I generally write just for me -- anyone with a journal-habit knows how therapeutic this is. But over 17 years ago I saw a reason and a need to share what I write with others. I painfully admit, since then, only a handful of my essays have been read by anyone. Today that changes, I'm breaking the silence. I've been considering publishing my essays on a blog for over 6 months now. Today is that "someday" I've been talking about. . . . Here is the essay I wrote back in 1993, when I first realized my writing had to be made public:

Relatives from around the country are gathered here in Iowa for my mother's funeral. Many of these people I haven't seen in several years. I was able to meet my uncle's "new" wife today. They've been married for more than 20 years. His first wife died very young from breast cancer. I didn't know her very well, but I remember she was the organist at our church. I like his new wife, she talks about her Lord and what He's been doing in her life. I wish we had more than a few hours together. Tomorrow we'll be scattered again -- me to California and they to Arkansas.

This meeting is painfully similar to another about ten years ago. It was then that I first met my grandfather's "new" wife. They too had been married for several years. His first wife had died from complications with diabetes. I didn't know her very well either, but I remember she was in church as often as her health would allow. And I liked his new wife too, she talked about her Lord and what He was doing in her life. And just like today, I wished then we had more than a few hours together.

Both of these men, my grandfather and my uncle, are strangers to me. The fact is, I only know their faces. Their lives are a mystery -- shrouded in years of silence. Their new wives are wonderfully open and joyful about their faith. I'd like to hope that within these men that same joy lives. But the truth is, I can't know for sure, they've never let me see that side of them. Silence runs deep in my family.

I suppose my uncle and my mother's dad are both Christian men. Why else would their new wives, such godly women, be drawn to marry them? But I just don't know. If church-going and being married to a godly woman will get you into heaven, then these men will be there. But surely there must be more. I pray their lives away from me are vibrantly faithful and filled with worship and service for our Lord. But I fear their silence.

I look over all the "things" my mother has left behind and I'm sick. What I ache for is a diary or anything that will let me know her heart. I don't really want these earthly baubles. Yet I know I will cling to them because this is all I have now. But what I desperately need is to know her heart, and this she didn't leave me.

The pastor of my mother's church is being very kind and saying how much he appreciated my mother's faithful attendance at his mid-week Bible study. But in the 15 years since my leaving home, she never mentioned to me that she did this. She never told me. Among her things we find a certificate awarded to her by the community. It says that after work she spent time helping underprivileged children learn to read. But again, I never knew, she never told me. One of her co-workers is handing me a crocheted book-marker in the form of a cross. She tells me Mom was her prayer partner and had made that for her. She thinks I would like to have it. But I never knew of her prayer life, she never told me. My heart breaks. . . .

Months have now passed since my mother's funeral. The silence is still deafening. And yet all I can do is think of my own children. Do they know me? Is my life an open book for them to read? Or have I failed to even write the pages for them? When my life is over, will they be left aching to have known my heart?

These generations of silence must be broken by me. I want them to know my heart and find me rejoicing in all my Lord Jesus has done for me. This will be the inheritance I leave for my family and friends.

Mark 5:19 "Go home to your people and report to them what great things the Lord has done for you, and how He had mercy on you."

Journal Suggestions:


Are there silences that need breaking in any of your relationships?

Describe the spiritual inheritance you have from your family.


Please use this link if you haven’t yet read my story, “Shattered Silence” which was added to this blog in 2013.